A Simple Winter Solstice Ceremony


Every year, our family of four – my partner and our two grown sons – celebrates  the Solstice together. On the day of our celebration, I put a candle in every room of the house. I purchase, or re-use from the previous year, four small white tapers and equip them with cardboard shields to protect our hands from dripping wax. At the center of our dining room table, I place a large, usually white or off-white sun candle. On the day of Solstice or near, I take evergreen and holly cuttings from the yard or woods (the children helped when they were small) and place those at the candle’s base.

The Solstice event itself begins after we eat dinner and clean up the dishes. By that time, it’s usually 7 or 8 o’clock at night. Our sons are dispatched to turn off all the lights throughout the house. This includes the outdoor lights and the Christmas tree. In our home years ago, we often had a wood fire burning. By the time all the lights were extinguished, the glow of the fire was all we had to see by.

We gather at the dining room table, each to his or her usual spot and holding one of the small tapers. We sit quietly in the dark, listening to our own breath and that of each other, to the sounds from outside – dogs barking, neighbors talking, cars breezing by.

On the first Solstice we celebrated as a family, I told the story about ancient humans and the longest night. Now that our sons are grown, one of them might tell that story, or we might skip it. But we never omit the next part. As we sit quietly in the dimness, we offer our musings and thoughts about darkness, including what we know to be good about it. We laugh during this part because we each have a standard line or two. My partner always says, “It’s good for sleeping.” The musings may include bits of our life, reflections on the past year, and our hopes for the new year.

“Your path is illuminated by the light
Yet darkness lets the stars shine bright.”

J.L.W. Brooks

After we’ve each spoken, we sit in silence another minute or two. Sometimes a prayer is said. When the time feels right I ask, “Are you ready to bring back the light?” With agreement from everyone, one of us strikes a match and touches the flame to the Sun candle. From this source, we spread illumination to our tapers and then throughout the house, “bringing back the light.”

Once our home is shimmering in candlelight, we gather near the tree, which has also been lit, and sing, “We Wish You a Happy Solstice” to the tune of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” Gift-giving follows. Our sons extinguish candles in all rooms except the one we’re in, and we open our gifts in the glow of the tree, the fireplace, the candles, and each other.

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